I walked up to the counter and wrote my name down, ‘Peter’, tore off no.17 and went back to wait with my dad for a table. Somehow, it brought back memories of the first time I ever ate ramen. I was 18 and I remembered clearly who was there and what I ordered too. It was the Tokyo Ramen and I had the green rice tea to quench my thirst. You are probably wondering, “Why do you remember what you ate and what you ordered? That’s kind of wierd.” It was because it was one my first memories when I came to Sydney to study. I remembered going, What is this ramen thing people are talking about? What’s so special about it? I tasted it and since then, there was no turning back, it’s one of the many Japanese delicacies I now crave every once in a while. 

My name was called. Off I went to grab a seat and look at the menu. I wanted to order the Tokyo Ramen to remind me of the first time I had it but I decided to call another type instead. I did order the Green Rice Tea but somehow, I don’t think it ever tasted quite as good as the first time I drank it at that restaurant but it was good nevertheless. I looked around me and I saw the table I sat at with my sister the first time. I also saw the book store opposite me which I was so fascinated by back then. It was the same setting but time as always, moved forward. I’m surrounded by different people and sounds but the memory of that first time lingers on. 

I spend the entire past year worrying about this society that I am leading. Now that it’s almost over, I think back of the first time I stepped into the room and asked a simple question to the first person I saw, “Hi, my name is Augustine. What do you study?”. That was literally what I asked every single person I saw at the meet and greet with new and existing members. I had a dream back then too, a dream that my sister went through. A dream where I would find true friendship and be surrounded by love. My misconception was thinking the path we take will be exactly the same. The fundamental truth about the path that each person takes is that it is always different regardless of the final destination. We all like a neat and tidy path but in reality, every path is a concoction of mess.

Sometimes, people ask things like “Hey, what is the best way to ask a girl out?” or “Hey, how do I avoid any complications at all?”. There is no best way. There are, better ways, sure but there is no best way. As for the latter, you are never going to be able to avoid complications and mistakes no matter what you do. Have a listen to Human by Jon McLaughlin. There’s a verse that says, “After all we are only human, always fighting what we’re feeling, hurt instead of healing. After all we are only human, is there any other reason why we stay instead of leaving?”. I can guarantee you that the path ahead of you is going to be a dirty and messy one but you are going to have to stick it through. You are going to have to realize that you are just human and that this is part of life. Don’t mistake a neat and tidy path for being perfect. 

No path is ever truly straight but because of that we live in fear. We live with the fear that we are going to be not accepted or be lonely or being rejected. Chances are at some point in your life, you are going to feel some of those emotions or maybe even all of them but you are going to have to say, ‘I know I am going through this.’ but you also have to say, ‘Let’s not give up and how do we make a better situation out of this and possibly learn from it.’ You adapt. You persevere. That’s what you need to do. You need to know where you are at but at the same time, don’t lay stagnant. 

I always have dreams of a perfect plan and where things will run absolutely smoothly. I don’t think it ever turn out the way it seems. There’s always something that somehow pops up and changes your direction. (Up till now, Arsenal (it’s a football/soccer club) still hasn’t won a trophy for 9 years.) So much for a perfect plan. When that happens, it’s always good to think back of why you started what you are doing in the first place. Thinking back of when I first started,  I asked people, “What are you studying? because I wanted to know people but most importantly, that question could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship. It brings me back to today, how far I have come and how many friendships have persevere because of that question alone. It brings a smile to my face. 

I may not be able to replicate the exact time and setting where I had my first ramen but I do remember clearly the first time I had it. I was such a happy kid and enjoyed every single bite of it. I still enjoyed it a lot, don’t get me wrong. If you need a ramen buddy, just call me. I will be there. That first time also reminded me that I should be open to new possibilities and places, that every day is a new day. It may always seem a bit fearful and scary at first but most often, there’s no harm trying something new. Don’ be fixated on creating the exact same experience and path each time a similar situation appears but rather think back of the lingering memory, carry it with you and let that memory of yours create new experiences and help you along your path regardless of what happens. 

You’ll be alright. 

 

 

Some of you may recognized this as the title to Tyler Ward’s album which is not really the point of this post. I just thought hey, the title fits what happened to my day today or more of what happened to people around me today. It couldn’t have been more contrasting in terms of events.

Hello.

Hello to a world of opportunities. Hello to the brave big world there is today. Hello to fears. Hello to insecurities. A really good friend of mine graduated today and this was his second degree. He graduated with a Masters in Counselling. I didn’t know if I was going to make it in time to his graduation ceremony as I had a test before that and so I told him I might not be able to come. Being the usual kind self, he said “don’t worry about it, you have done more than enough for me.” I was going to write a card to him to make up for not coming. The card never materialised cause well, I went. I guess what I’m about to write echoes what I would have written. Graduation ceremonies are one of the most pivotal moments in your life. It is here you start leaving the comfort zone of your training ground. It is here you start to realize what a harsh world reality is. It is never what you prepared for in universities. It is never what you anticipated. There are just too many variables to know what to expect. it is here you decide what kind of man you want to be. It is also here you are going to impart your knowledge on the world. Going to university is so much more than receiving a degree. We are always constantly learning and it wouldn’t stop for the world and it wouldn’t stop after university finishes. You sharpen your minds yes. Your sharpen your cognitive skills yes. But you also learn, hopefully how to be a better person through your failings, sufferings and happiness. Even at the stage of tertiary education, you don’t realize it but you are already contributing to the society. It’s just a different audience after graduating. Graduating is about realizing the journey is not over, it’s only the start of something new. Hello world. Hello to hope.

Love

It’s Life Week in my university this week. So I was out helping promoting awareness of poverty and the situation it really is in the world and the local areas. At this area called Woolloomooloo, you always see homeless people on the streets and just how scary it is for them. One of the things I did when I came to Sydney was to take a homeless walk. It is then I realized how awful their situation is. Every morning, they have to fold their broken mattresses and pack up immediately because the police and council will chase them away. They can’t even afford to have a temporary home. So in the efforts of promoting world poverty, we came up with this thing called the poverty challenge where you go a whole day just eating one bowl of rice. Honestly, that’s more than a lot of people eat on a regular basis. So, here was I talking to random people and friends regarding the situation, this guy asked my friend, “Wait, is it brown or white rice?” while completely missing the point of the poverty challenge. You can’t like choose what kind of food you want in a poverty challenge like “Hey mate, can I like you know have salt and soya sauce with the rice?”. That being said, most people slowed down on their fast paced life to listen about poverty and you get that sense of love from them. The same kind a poor child shows when he smiles with the simplest things in life, contended with every single bit of blessing he has. Don’t forget how fortunate you are. It is not that God doesn’t love these poor souls but rather they are the ones that are teaching us. There is more for us to learn from a homeless man than he from us. Love does not stem from materialistic needs but rather it stems from trying to give others the best you can even though at times it may feel as though if you have nothing. If you have heart and soul, you will go far in life.

Heartbreak

A friend of mine went through a heartbreak today. And it was sad and terrible. I can only empathize while trying to grasp the situation. I been through my fair share of heartbreaks but never like this I guess. Most of us have been through emotional sadness but we all deal with it differently as we all have different backgrounds and influences while growing up. At the end of it, we can only do what we can to help others. We lend a listening ear and advice that is needed at the time. When a relationship between a guy and girl fails to materialize, we grief. Why do we grief? We do because there is so much potential to be tapped and the worst part of it all is you don’t get the happy ending you deserve. People get mad when novels and movies don’t have the happy ending they want. Strikes and protests will be held over it. That’s how desperately we want one. What really is a happy ending? It is not about sailing off into sunsets and growing old together under the moon. At least, that’s my point of view. Happiness is not about the length of time spent with that person but rather about making the most of the time you had with that person to begin with. What’s the point of a relationship if you didn’t appreciate the time you had with the person? If you keep regretting over your past mistakes and contemplate on the what ifs, you will fail to see the beauty of it all. I would like to think the other person didn’t want to hurt you to begin with but after all, we are only human. We mess up and we screw up and that’s going to happen like a vicious cycle. Don’t forget what happened so that it can remind you of the future but also forgive and learn to let go if you love yourself. Don’t fuel yourself with so much hate. It’s much easier to live life forgiving others and than not. Take your time. Grief. And when you’re ready, let go. The healing can only then begin. 

This is probably the longest I have written but I hope I made sense. I like you am also learning. Love while you can and don’t forget you are not alone as you think you are. As the Switchfoot song goes, I dare you to move.